Recovery Rituals Those who are successful in their recovery have a suite of recovery practices that keep them “on track.” They put their willingness to change into intentional, disciplined daily rituals. This is the work that triggers transformation. Rituals support recovery. They foster psychological and spiritual growth. Engaging in recovery practices prevents you from falling back into addiction. These practices not only help you grow, they give you the freedom to be who y

People often enter recovery when they “wake up” to the pain of addiction. They see that addiction has not brought them happiness and fulfillment, but tenfold pain. In the midst of this pain, people surrender to their need for recovery. Stopping addictive behaviors and becoming sober is just the beginning. You work your recovery not just to get sober, but to be happy. Like life itself, recovery is a process, not an event. Recovery does not get a day off. If you are not moving

The key to a long and happy life is effective pain management. The key to recovery is also effective pain management. In recovery, you renounce addicting as a way of managing pain. It is only when you renounce addicting that you can learn other ways to manage pain. Pain is Nature’s most important and demanding teacher. It signals when our survival or well-being are compromised.  It tells you when you are not right with life. Pain can be biological, psychological, interpersona

Complacency is a false sense of safety when in danger. For victims of addiction, that danger is addiction. This danger varies from minimal to significant, depending on the type of addiction, the addiction severity, recovery skills, and life skills. Life skills include managing stress, living a balanced life, taking accountability, living with integrity, and loving. For the more fortunate, complacency may not be an issue; they can stop addicting and never feel an urge to addic

“Holding anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” Gautama Buddha Resentments arise from failed expectations. You expect people or situations to differ from what they are. You expect things to be as you want them, as if you were God. People shouldn’t be hurtful, neglectful, or deceitful. People should be loving, considerate, generous, and kind. But this is not Reality. People are not always loving, cons

Do you know your dark side? Your destructive thoughts, feelings, and actions? Do you know your character vulnerabilities? If so, you’re a step ahead of those who don’t. Some people need to be right at all costs in all situations. Their shame-based need for self-perfection creates self-righteousness. This self-righteousness blinds them to their dark side. These people can never grow or heal. They’re right, and you’re wrong. They offend from the victim position. If they upset y

It is easy for life to get in the way of recovery. Yet without recovery, you have nothing else. The stresses and demands of work and family often crowd out time for recovery work. You may feel the need to skip recovery meetings to make more money. A loved one may ask for more of your time. There may be a project that demands your time. You may consider recovery to be less important than other life demands. You may tell yourself you will get back to recovery work “when there i

What is authenticity and how does it impact upon recovery? Authenticity refers to genuineness. When you are authentic, you are allowing yourself to be you. Authentic people are like young children. When you are yourself, you can make authentic connections with others. Authentic connection fills the psychological void that so often fuels addiction. You can enjoy seeing and being seen with love and acceptance. Authenticity can be destructive if not filtered. Respectful authenti

Becoming motivated for recovery involves three things: Sensitizing ourselves to the reality and pain of the illness of addiction, developing hope that recovery will be a better solution, and removing any roadblocks to change, including arranging for the help we need to enter recovery. People used to think that “hitting bottom” is the beginning of recovery. This is not the case, as many people suffering from addiction fall into hopelessness and despair. In this state, we are a